Friday, May 05, 2006

Che Cazzo!!! blogging while angry, part 2

So after a wonderful day,eating gelato, having champagne with Max and her cool expat friends, I went with Max to Paolo's studio to check emails. Good thing I decided to call my home phone. There was a message from a week ago from my insurance company. my car is a total loss and I need to get my car from the body shop. the shop charges a daily fee to hold the car. I am in fucking italy!!! I left a message on my home phone saying to call my italian cell number if there was anything urgent. Why did no one call me! My boss is going to get my car during her lunch. Hopefully the body shop won't charge too much.

My parents just sent me a check to pay off the last of my student debt. I was so excited I would finally be debt fee. Now I have to buy a fucking new car or get a very good used one. I don't want a car note. I have very unstable job in an very unstable business. This is fucking bullshit. I could kill the fucking moron who hit my car.

Too say that I am livid would be an understatement. There is no way to get around this. You must have a car in Los Angeles.

I wish I could just stay in Rome and fuck all this bullshit. Nothing has gone right since I moved to "Hell ay".


gibber said...

What the hell do they mean it's a total loss?? It drives, does it not? Ahhhhh! Insurance companies...what are they good for! I don't understand. Why do you have coverage if they won't pay when you need it?

Ok, Breathe in, breathe out. let it go. Have some gelato, some good wine, and let it go girl. You are having too good a time to let this get to you.

nyc/caribbean ragazza said...

I don't know. I didn't sleep at all last night and have been teary all fucking morning. Between this and dealing with work calls, I'm done.

JCinNYC said...

Hey Arlene,
I've enjoyed reading your blog so much -- especially since you've been in Italy. The postings have been so rich and energetic, and you can tell the trip has been nurturing you. What happened with your car SUCKS, and I'm sure it must seem like such an invasion of your time away. But...(you knew that was coming, right) a wise person (don't ask me who) once said that 10% of life is what happens to us and 90% is how we react to it. And while it's one of those sayings that makes you want to slug the person who says it in the moment they're saying it, it's sorta true. Now, let's look at what happened: You're crusing along, going about your business, when -- WHAM -- someone hits you. Your go back and forth with the insurance company, the car goes in the shop, you go away, and while you're away you learn that the car is a "loss" and you need to get a new one. (Hello, metaphoric moment!) Maybe you NEED to get rid of that car on many levels. As maddening and annoying and scary as the thought of investing in a new one is -- maybe you need to to let it go (both in the actual and metaphoric sense) in order to really move forward and get yourself where you really want to be. Remember this year's best picture? In Los Angeles, sometimes we crash into people just so we can feel something. So, going back to the 10%/90% thing, if the car really is lost, then have your moment of tears and frustration and then choose to start looking at the whole incident as an opportunity you've been given, a wake up call, a great lesson. And the timing is actually good. You're in a beautiful place that you love far away from all the nonsense, a place where you can get some perspective on this and turn it around so it no longer scares you but serves you. You'll see. It may not be evident right now, but I think that crash was no "accident" in the bigger picture sense and the moment you're in that new car, you will begin to drive yourself to places that that old ride never could have taken you. Now, get out there and enjoy yourself. Ciao!

gibber said...

JCinNYC said it better than I could. You've got to let it go - you put too much effort into this vacation to let something that is completely out of your control ruin it.

I hope you've wiped away the tears and continued you journey thru Italy. When do you head up the coast?

nyc/caribbean ragazza said...

thanks gibber,
I leave for positano on wednesday morning.

jcinnyc....thank you. I have some time to think about it. I cannot get overwhelmed and start obsessing about all the things that are not going well. I need to just enjoy my trip and I will deal with my car when I get back to LA.