Tuesday, December 01, 2009

randomissimo - Tiger, Desperate Housewives, men

I think Tiger Woods needs a new publicist stat.

Why is the Susan character on Desperate Housewives so annoying? I wish she was killed off last season.

What cocktail should I make for the Mad Men Season Three premiere (In Italy) December 13th?

Why do people in America keep asking me if I've met a man yet? How many times must I tell them "Under A Tuscan Sun" is fiction!

Speaking of men, I'm done. I need to focus on work. I really can't get distracted. Clearly there's something wrong with me and I no longer need/want to make a fool out of myself. If shit hasn't worked out by this age...it never will. It's some kind of fucked karma that I'm writing a romantic comedy and have nothing positive to draw from. Nothing. That is not normal. Everyone says write what you know. Trust, nobody wants to see that movie.

I can relate to this clip minus the having sex with Jon Bon Jovi. Oh yeah and the therapy part. I was one of maybe two people I knew in Hollywood not in therapy. Perhaps I should have been.


glamah16 said...

Hey we all have been there. Just focus on work and the rest will follow.

nyc/caribbean ragazza said...

glamah16 - i'm going to. It's for the best.

Stacy said...

Well I have to agree-- men disappoint. And in the short time that I've been here I've noticed that about Italian men in particular. Ok-- just yesterday I had another wake up call with yet another ridiculous Italian so I'm a little (unfairly) bitter, can you tell? :)

I agree that you should focus on the things that make you happy (work, friends, etc) but I don't think you should completely shut the door on the possibility of love. Not being in a relationship does NOT mean that there's something wrong with you. There's no law that says you're supposed to be married by X age (no matter how hard society tries to cram it down our throats). If you want it to happen, it will... I know sooner rather than later would be great but unfortunately we can't control the when or the how (for example: one of my best friends, a beautiful, smart, successful 42 year old woman in New York, just met and married her husband last October after 7 months of dating-- and they just had their first child).

In the meantime, do you. And I say go ahead and make a fool out of yourself for love, who's watching? Who's judging? There's nothing wrong with believing in someone, even if they do turn out to disappoint or be the wrong one.

Sorry for the two cents, at this point its probably the last thing you want to hear (esp from a total stranger), but the finality of your words just made me a bit sad and I couldn't help but comment.

*Ok, stepping down off my soapbox now... :)

gibber said...

Stacy, get out of my head! :). I can't say it any better, so I won't.

Eleonora said...

Love the clip!
And as far as the Susan character... I agree, she should be shot.

Lola xx

J.Doe said...

No matter what you say, as long as you are in Italy Americans will think you are living an Under the Tuscan sun Life. It's sad but they have preconceived notions of what life is like in Italy and don't want to hear about reality.
Just focus on you...having fun, work etc., and don't worry about the other stuff.

nyc/caribbean ragazza said...

stacy - thanks for the positivity. And it's okay to be bitter once in a while. Just don't let it consume you.

I must say that my Italian male friends are incredible. Super supportive and would drop everything if I needed help. One friend in particular is one of the most giving people I know. Of course they are only friends, hence part of the freaking problem. I'm swear I have a sign on my head that say "buddy".

Perhaps I'm being a little melodramatic. Another writer friend said we are way in our heads too much. Over thinking everything.

That said, I feel like I just need to protect myself and therefore it's really not worth it to put myself out there anymore. It has never worked. Why would things change now? Especially when women over 30 have a tough time when it comes to dating. Put race in the mix and it's just jacked up all around.

gibber - I know what you trying to say but you met your husband in college. Insanity is repeating the same action and expecting a different result. No more.

Lola - she is beyond grating. Thank God for Bree. I think she the best character on the show.

j. doe - Just wait until EAT, PRAY, LOVE comes out. The Italy part was the best section of the book.

Kim B. said...

I feel you. And I can only second Stacy's comments. Heck, I went through a period in my late twenties/early thirties when I kept wondering if MAYBE I WAS A LESBIAN AND DIDN'T KNOW IT (!)!)!)!) -- I figured I must have been sending out some signals of which I was unaware but that guys could clearly read.

Life is weird and hard on us sometimes. But you absolutely never, never know when cupid might strike. Hang in there. You've got the right attitude. And some day some guy will get you (in my case, it took an Italian as bizarre and wacky as me).


Ms. Violetta said...

Can relate to this post. I have stopped trying to look for someone. I find it exhausting. I'm almost 40 and its time out for on the dating scene. I truly don't thrive well in that world of trying to woo and charm. I want peace, happiness and good health.

nyc/caribbean ragazza said...

kimb - Ha. A few years ago a "power" lesbian in Hollywood asked me out. Our mutual male friend had told I was straight. While I was flattered (she's an amazing person) and I have a lot of close female friends, I'm not attracted to women in that way. I asked my friend why this woman thought I was gay and he said, "you have short hair and you're wearing "lesbian chic" glasses. Bwahahah. Okay. No one gave me a memo telling me that when I bought those frames.

ms. violetta - now that I live here it's different but I remember in the States there was this idea that since you look for a job, you have to look for love. I'm not sure how I feel about that. No one in my immediate family went "looking" for love. It found them. Dating is supposed to be fun and back in L.A. if felt more like a contact sport. Anyway right now I need to be more concerned about my financial future than my romantic one. Yes I know a "paycheck can't give you a hug" but being able to pay rent is important!

Kim B. said...

haha, that's hilarious. Come to think of it, I was wearing very short hair too. And once I guy I was on a date with said, "What's with the lesbian haircut?" That was a sign that was not a good evening . . . it went down in the annals as my worst date ever.

Now I'm realizing though no woman asked me out either (in addition to no men!!)

Stacy said...

Ahh the "buddy" tag-- I think we've all been there. It sucks. In any case, focusing on other things is a great idea-- I'm sure your life is already full, with/without a man. The love part will catch up when it will :)

Oh and when I get back to the States I'll be sure to tell everyone that they can stop with all the Eat Pray Love/Under the Tuscan Sun madness... my first hand account is that men are still just men, even in bella Italia :)

Italiana Americana said...

At least Italian men are more charming even though they are just as bad as any other man! I'm 22 and I can't find someone and it should be easy!

I've been spoiled by the charming italian men...:(( Now that i'm in america its so hard!

jadie said...

how disappointing to feel let down again, and yes, how easy to swear off hope. i am convinced that there is a key, which is to accept oneself AS IS, with all one's aspects, and to expect to meet someone from that vantage point. i mean, it's right and reasonable and healthy to want someone who knows you, is supportive and warmly connected. you SHOULD expect that. xoxo

nyc/caribbean ragazza said...

stacy - yes please spread the word.

italiana Americana - It may be different for other American women but my experience in L.A.? No flirty, no charming comments, no nothing. Italy is completely different. I have to see where you are living.

jadie - you're right. It is reasonable and normal to want those things. I feel is just not in the cards for me. Maybe I should pray to St. Raphael, patron saint of singles. :)

Kataroma said...

I'm also think it's important to know how to be single in order to be available when Mr Right comes along. If you're with Mr Wrong when Mr Right comes galloping up on his white horse you may not even notice him as you're too busy obsessing over Mr WRong's latest game playing. :)

The other thing which I've noticed with some single friends (but by no means all) is that they have all these rules about what men they'll date ie. must be a certain height, a certain income, a certain race/religion, a certain social class or a certain age. These women won't even notice the short, non-rich, younger/older guy with the Brooklyn accent (or whatever) because they're looking for someone who looks like the quarterback of the high school football team.

nyc/caribbean ragazza said...

kataroma - I agree with you. One of my friends in L.A. calls it the "better, bigger, syndrome." So many people are looking around for that "perfect" man or woman they don't see the amazing person standing right in from of them.

Superficial stuff doesn't matter. Do you share some core values, how do you feel when you're around that person? Those thing in the long run mean a lot more.

Liane Spicer said...

For whatever reason, this post made me laugh.

Tiger Woods: No comment.

Susan/Desperate Housewives: Uber-annoying.

Can't recommend a cocktail. I take my poison straight.

Men: Can relate, all right. Making an ass of yourself loses its appeal more and more the older you get. When you attain sufficient distance, you then amuse yourself by watching the men make asses of themselves - sometimes over you.

As for writing what you know: someone said that should be 'write what you know emotionally'. And I'm sure that part of you knows a lot.

nyc/caribbean ragazza said...

Liane - that is a great quote. Thank you!

Farah Fanciful said...

I absolutely, 100%, totally and completely LOVEEEEE your blog:)

nyc/caribbean ragazza said...

farah - Thanks for stopping by!